32 results for tag: Conscious Relationships


What Porcupines Can Teach Us About Making Love

How do we learn about making love? A book, our parents, porn, movies, TV, social media? How about porcupines? This is a hilarious and insightful video and article about relationships, sex, and making love. I will not add anything; please enjoy the video and reflection on making love....

Conflict Resolution: Transform Your Conflict Cycle

Most couples struggle with conflict resolution. They may call it communication, anger issues, conflict avoidance, contempt, manipulation, narcissism, trauma response, triggers, etc., but we are often talking about conflict resolution.

"What is conflict? Conflict is a normal part of any healthy relationship. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything, all the time. The key is not to fear or try to avoid conflict but to learn how to resolve it in a healthy way.

When conflict is mismanaged, it can cause great harm to a relationship, but when handled in a respectful, positive way, conflict provides an opportunity to strengthen the bond between two people. Whether you’re experiencing conflict at home, work, or school, learning these skills can help you resolve differences in a healthy way and build stronger, more rewarding relationships." Excerpt from Conflict Resolution Skills.
Conflict resolution skills allow us to shift our conflict cycle to create an environment supportive of connection, safety, trust, and intimacy. Trust is the primary component of successful relationships and connections. Creating or rebuilding trust can take time, patience, and a willingness to step outside our comfort zone through conflict resolution....

A New Study Reveals the Secret of Why Men Fall in Love

Why men fall in love. This is not as obvious as it seems on the surface.

When I was an adolescent boy, I was very confused about what it was that I liked about girls besides their physical appearance. There were girls who I thought were very pretty and attractive, but I had no desire to be with them. Conversely, there were girls that I was only mildly physically attracted to, but they were fun, intelligent, attractive, creative, and forces of nature, which turned me on in a completely different way. When attracted to them, physically, mentally, and emotionally, my brain didn't work well! I was flooded with emotions, feelings, and thoughts that I didn't know what to do with, and felt shame about most of them. Looking back, I am aware that physical attraction was often the starting point. It didn't make sense to me, because I did not have a "type" of girl that I was attracted to. I was confused by how I felt powerless about who I got excited about, and who I didn't.

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Fight Languages: How we Argue Is Key to Healthy Relationships

For those of you that have been reading my posts for a while, you are aware of The Rules For Fair Fighting in Relationships. Many of you know the Five Love Languages Gary Chapman, Ph.D. introduced. If not, you can learn about them easily here What are the 5 love languages? Fight Languages having a name is new to me. I understood the principles but did not have a term to express them. How we fight with our partner(s), friends, family, and neighbors often defines the nature of our relationships. Understanding how your partner or friends/family argue is essential to creating thoughtful, loving resolutions, trust, and safety....

Sex Therapy – Is It Time to See a Sex Therapist?

How do you know when it is time to see a Sex Therapist or Sex Counselor? First things first, how do you know IF you would benefit from seeing a Sex Therapy or Sex Counseling?

What is Sex Therapy and Sex Counseling?

Sex Therapy 101

"First, let’s talk about what this particular type of therapy is. Put very simply, the goal is to help you have a sex life that feels healthy and happy to you. Sex therapy recognizes that sexuality is an integral part of our lives, and seeks to provide education and resources to support you. It can include things like identifying your beliefs or blockages around sex, helping you gain clarity on your goals for your sex life, providing accurate and shame-free information, teaching new sexual skills, improving your communication, or developing sexual self-confidence. Even though there still aren’t a ton of sex therapists out there, I think it’s really important to look around before picking who you want to work with. I strongly believe that the fit between the sex therapist and client is important. If you don’t feel connected to and trusting of who you work with, you’re not going to get much benefit out of the experience. Check out the websites of a few therapists in detail before booking an appointment, and don’t be afraid to end your working relationship if your gut’s telling you it doesn’t feel right."  This excerpt is from What Happens In Sex Therapy? by

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Boundaries Help Us Connect + Exquisite Consent

I have just returned from two weeks at the annual Dance New England Dance Camp. I have been a participant for eleven years and an organizer for the last four. We created an ad hoc Consent and Boundaries Team to support even more safety and connection within our community. We created an amazing flyer on exquisite boundaries (below), we offered an evening dinner table for conversations around consent, a powerful and entertaining forum on consent and boundaries including Playback Theater, and we purchased 300 wristbands with the saying, "Boundaries Help Us Connect". It was an intense and rewarding experience creating these programs that were received enthusiastically!...

What I Wish I’d Known Before Moving in Together

Moving in together can be a glorious and stressful experience. The prospect of sharing space, bills, meals, conversation and a bed can be incredibly exciting.

What happens if it doesn't work out?

What happens if it does work out?

Do we really know each other well enough yet?

Early in the pandemic, I ended up working with several couples who had just started dating before the pandemic, and decided moving in together to have someone to quarantine with sounded better than being alone. I mean, we had no idea how long we were going to be quarantining, so why not? I recognize how funny this sounds, but, why not? Couples have been thrown together into arranged marriages for millennium after first meeting each other. It is not like this is a new process.

I really enjoyed the experience of working with new couples just after moving in together, being around each other 24/7 while working or going to school remotely, or not having any work or school, just staying home all day together. In case you are curious, many succeeded. In fact, two got married the following year and started families together!

Moving in together is not a straightforward process. Patience and flexibility are required while figuring out how to mesh two complete lives together. I hope you enjoy this article as much as I did on moving in together....


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