Surrender

Surrender. Is there a scarier or more freeing word than surrender? Surrender. I invite you to sit with this word and let it move around in your mind and belly. What does surrender bring up for you? Panic? Fear? Humiliation? Joy? Victory? Success? Freedom? Release?

What is surrender for you? What do you need to surrender at this moment or time in your life? Control? Power? Money? Sex? Drugs? Alcohol? Image? Dating? Loneliness? Status? Him? Her? Them? Attachment? Hate? Anger? Fear? Control? I am aware I already put control on the list. Life? Your body? Success? Failure? Orgasms? Love? A relationship? A job? Fun? Laughter? Facebook? Silence? Stillness? Noise? Busyness? Resistance? The First Step? Twelve Steps? Stepping Out? Ego? Perfection? Recovery? Control? EVERYTHING?

What do you need to surrender to find peace?

“You need to trust
To surrender
To ask for guidance
Go within for the answers
They’re within you
You have the answers
All you need do is ask”
― Karen Hackel, The Whisper of Your Soul

“Reason lost the battle, and all I could do was surrender and accept I was in love.”
― Paulo Coelho, The Witch Of Portobello

Something amazing happens when we surrender and just love. We melt into another world, a realm of power already within us. The world changes when we change. The world softens when we soften. The world loves us when we choose to love the world.”
― Marianne Williamson

Surrender

“The subconscious self knows how to get there, but you may not. If you want to let it do the work, maybe just hint with some guidelines or wishes and get out of the way. It’s hard to let loose of control, of the steering wheel, but you’ll have to show trust, a huge dollop of trust that is uncomfortable, but it’s necessary to break through.

Put that trust in your greater self that the outcome will be even better than you would have managed on your own. You’re working together on this, it’s just the two of you, but you’re a team. You have to surrender the reins from time to time (OK, most of the time) if you want to get any of the real work done, the valuable work, the work that you just plain can’t do alone.

Surrender and Let Go

Close your eyes, let go of the reins, put your trust in yourself. See what happens.”  from Pass The Sour Cream

The Art of Surrender

“Surrender literally means to stop fighting. Stop fighting with yourself. Stop fighting the universe and the natural flow of things. Stop resisting and pushing against reality.

Surrender = Complete acceptance of what is + Faith that all is well, even without my input. 

It’s not about inaction. It’s about taking action from that place of surrender energy.

If letting go of control and surrendering not only feel better, but actually produce better results, how do we do that?

Sometimes it’s as easy as noticing that you’re in control mode and choosing to let go—consciously and deliberately shifting into surrender energy.

For example, when I become aware that I’m in control mode, I imagine that I’m in a small canoe paddling upstream, against the current. It’s hard. It’s a fight. That’s what control mode feels like to me.

When I choose to let go and surrender, I visualize the boat turning around, me dropping the oars, and floating downstream.

I’m being gently pulled, no effort necessary on my part. Simply breathing and saying, “Let go of the oars” is usually enough to get me there.

Sometimes it’s a little harder to make the shift from control to surrender. Here are a few questions that can help:

1. What am I afraid will happen if I let go of control? 

When you pinpoint the fear, question its validity. Ask yourself, Is it true? If you’re afraid the night will be ruined if your boyfriend doesn’t remember to pick up eggplant (and you’ve already reminded him fourteen times), question that assumption.

Can you really know the night would be ruined without the eggplant? And if it would be ruined (by your definition, anyway), what’s so bad about that?

2. Find out whose business you’re in. 

Your business is the realm of things that you can directly influence. Are you there? Or are you in someone else’s business? When we’re trying to control things outside of our own business, it’s not going to go well.

3. Consider this: Would letting go feel like freedom?

It almost always would. Let that feeling of freedom guide you toward loosening your grip.

A Friendly Universe

Einstein said, “The most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or hostile universe.”

I believe in a friendly universe.

Being receptive and allowing things to happen is a skill that can be practiced and improved upon. It helps to believe in a friendly universe—one that is supporting you at every turn so that you don’t have to worry yourself over the details.

We can always choose to do things the easy way or the hard way. We can muscle through, or we can let go of the oars and let the current carry us downstream.

There is a peaceful, yet focused energy that accompanies holding the intention of what I want, but not forcing myself to do it. That energy is magic. I’m still a work in progress, but I’m allowing it to become a habit instead of making it a habit.” by Dr. Amy Johnson from Tina Buddha

“I wonder if pain comes from surrendering or resisting?”
― Donna Lynn Hope

“If you want to make someone feel emotion, you have to make them let go. Listening to something is an act of surrender.“ Brian Eno

Someone once told me, “Surrender is the hardest thing to do when you are in it, but the easiest thing to do once you have done it”. What are your experiences with surrender?

Other posts you may enjoy:

Doubt

Spiritual Change: Tie Your Shoes Different

Spiritual Training on Humility: The Janitor Part I

Why You Don’t Need To Be Right All The Time

Life Lessons Learned from Akeelah and The Bee

25 Signs You’re Succeeding At Life (Even if it doesn’t feel like it)

Things Your Couples Counselor Already Knows About Your Relationship

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