Kindness. Many years ago a friend looked me in the eye and said, “If you want humility, and you really need it, do something good for someone else and don’t get caught”. My immediate thought was to punch him in the mouth, fortunately, I chose to just shut up and be angry.

Do something good for someone else and don’t get caught. This phrase haunted me. I could not understand why you would want to do something good for somebody else and not get credit any for it. What was the point? What would I get out of it? How would they know I did it? The little I did not understand this spiritual truth.

 

Several weeks later I decided to bring the phrase, “Do something good for someone else and don’t get caught” into my daily morning meditation practice. I will not lie, it irritated me daily until it hit me, do something good for someone else and don’t Caught meant that if I do something good for someone else and don’t get caught; I get the reward in the benefit of helping others, not me. The idea that someone else would get benefit from my actions had not really occurred to me. This was something of a turning point for me in my life. I realize writing and sharing this with you, how funny it may sound that there was benefit in doing something good for someone else being a foreign concept to me.

 

Random Act Of Kindness From Thailand Will Make You Cry

 

Truthfully, it seems hard to believe that I had reached age 30 without knowing this simple basic truth; there is reward in doing something good without directly receiving recognition. Besides the obvious rewards of sharing, connection, self-esteem, humility and character, I discovered that I actually feel better about myself when I do something good for someone else than when I do something for myself. This was new to me.

 

For several years when I lived in Madison, Wisconsin, I was working with the Urban League of Greater Madison. I still to this day think I had the best job title anybody can have, Achieving Greatness Through Service Coordinator! The program was based on a model promoting youth service and community through the above quote by Dr. Martin Luther King.

 

Do something good for someone else and don’t get caught. What does that mean? It can be simple things like adjusting the thermostat in the house to meet the needs of your family and friends instead of your own personal comfort. Maybe now and then we can leave a ridiculously large tip at a restaurant for someone working real hard and not earning enough money. Is there a neighbor who would appreciate you shoveling their sidewalk in the snow when they’re away? Watering their garden during a dry week in summer?

 

“Beginning today, treat everyone you meet as if they were going to be dead by midnight. Extend to them all the care, kindness and understanding you can muster, and do it with no thought of any reward. Your life will never be the same again.” ~ Og Mandino

 

It is easy to think in a world that has more than 7 billion people what we do does not matter. It does! I invite you to take a minute and reflect on the countless number of people along the way that have showed-up in big and small ways offering you guidance, support, compassion, empathy and love.

 

 

“You can’t live a perfect day without doing something for someone who will never be able to repay you.” ~ John Wooden

 

Do Something Good For Someone Else – Bus #44 Award Winning Short Film

 

I was living with extended family in an old farmhouse on a 105 acre tree farm. One of the community members had a friend named Elin. The two of us never really hit it off. We never argued or had any tension, we just never became friends. One day I came home returning tired and frustrated from a long day of work. As I walked through the living room feeling the warmth of the wood stove on a cold snowy winter night, I noticed a very large  blue and red Afghan lying on the table with a simple note written by hand, “Michael”. I did not know what it meant, so I continued on through the house. When I made my way to the kitchen everybody was sitting down eating lasagna. Someone said, “Did you see the Afghan that Elin made for you?” I was startled. I did not know what to say. Noticing that they were all looking at me waiting for me to respond, I looked at Elin smiling sheepishly, “Thank you”. I quickly left the kitchen darting for my bedroom. I did not come out all night.

 

 

The Afghan mentioned above is still part of my life more than 20 years later! Not only do I enjoy and love it, but it has a reputation beyond me and keeping warm on cold winter nights. I often use that Afghan to cover people during a Reiki Treatment when they are cold. Over the years it has gotten a reputation as being The Magic Blanket, because everybody who is covered with this Afghan feels safe and loved! I think this is a fine example of how one person can share their gifts making a difference for many people that they will never meet.

 

“Sometimes someone says something really small, and it just fits right into this empty place in your heart.” ~ From the television show My So-Called Life

 

“I will tell you a story. One night a man came to our house and told me, “There is a family with eight children. They have not eaten for days.”
I took some food with me and went. When I came to that family, I saw the faces of those little children disfigured by hunger. There was no sorrow or sadness in their faces, just the deep pain of hunger. I gave rice to the mother. She divided the rice in two, and went out, carrying half the rice. When she came back, I asked her, “Where did you go?” She gave me this simple answer, “To my neighbors; they are hungry also!” I was not surprised that she gave-poor people are really very generous. I was surprised that she knew they were hungry. As a rule, when we are suffering, we are so focused on ourselves, we have no time for others.” Mother Teresa

 

The Science of Kindness (Life Vest Inside)

 

There was a period in the year 2000 when I was doing some really focused work that included 3 to 5 hours of Reiki and meditation per day.  In addition, I worked two part-time jobs; one at a homeless shelter and the other as a case manager at a halfway house for alcoholics and addicts. I do not remember the specifics, but I ran into a financial obstacle and did not know how I would afford rent and food.

 

 

I was living on the outskirts of Hoosier National Forest in a simple little double-wide then. One day I walked out to the street to get the mail. I noticed there was a white envelope with my name and address, but no return address or stamp. I opened it while walking pulling out a yellow lined sheet of paper and several $100 bills fell to the ground. After picking them up, I read the short handwritten note about compassion, love and service. The person spoke about how much they appreciate how much I give and my commitment. They commented on the fact that I had just completed a 10 day training with The Dalai Lama and how everybody benefits from this work. The note was unsigned. My heart quivered and a tear rolled down my cheek. This type of kindness and doing good for someone else can change lives.

 

 

 

“During my second year of nursing school our professor gave us a quiz. I breezed through the questions until I read the last one: “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?” Surely this was a joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Before the class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our grade. “Absolutely,” the professor said. “In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say hello.” I’ve never forgotten that lesson. I also learned her name was Dorothy.” ~ JoAnn C. Jones, Guideposts, January 1996 

 

The following poem from the Tao Te Ching by Lao Tzu is my favorite.  This one is particularly beautiful translated by Gia-Fu Feng and Jane English.

 

Tao Te Ching #49 – Lao Tzu (Laozi)

Forty-nine
The sage has no mind of his own.
He is aware of the needs of others.
I am good to people who are good.
I am also good to people who are not good.
Because Virtue is goodness.
I have faith in people who are faithful.
I also have faith in people who are not faithful.
Because Virtue is faithfulness. 

The sage is shy and humble – to the world he seems confusing.
Others look to him and listen.
He behaves like a little child. 

How have you experienced kindness and people who do something good and don’t get caught? When you do something good and don’t get caught, how does it affect you? When somebody receives this gift, how has it affected them?

 

Other posts you may enjoy:

Doubt

I Am Not A Healer

Blindness – A Spiritual Teaching in Seeing

The Art of Knowing is Knowing What to Ignore

Spiritual Training on Humility – The Janitor Part I

Does Kindness Make You More Attractive? Research Says Yes!

Things Your Couples Counselor Already Knows About Your Relationship

Michael Swerdloff

Providence Holistic Counseling Services

What is Reiki Counseling?

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