7 results for tag: Sadness

My Fantasy of the Dalai Lama was Shattered & I am Sad Today

I was scrolling through my Facebook feed yesterday and noticed that a friend I respect and admire had made a casual, sarcastic, and off-putting comment about the Dalai Lama. My initial reaction was, “What the f*ck?” Anger, betrayal, and rejection of my friend, not the Dalai Lama, rose inside me. She is not somebody who typically speaks harshly of people. So, I did what we do in 2023. I did a Google search on the Dalai Lama. The first eight were articles about him and his life. When I read the ninth, my heart sank and my spine went limp for a split second. “The Dalai Lama asks a boy to suck his tongue.” I resisted opening the ...

This Sculpture Shows The Inner Child In Us – Love

We all have a little boy or little girl inside us, or both. Many people refer to this part of ourselves as the Inner Child. The term Inner Child gets used a lot these days, but what is the Inner Child? I like the description below. "The inner child lives in all of us; it is who we were before life happened to us. When the negative experiences of life happen in childhood, our inner child becomes fragmented. We disconnect from that vital aspect of ourselves and shove that part of our psyche down into the dark. As we grow up, the inner child is still very much alive, often dictating our responses to life. Those traumas that you experi...

Arguments About $ Aren’t About Money

Arguments. The first time I meet a new couple that I am working with, I ask them to each share why they are here today. Almost without exception, they each launch into a one-sided description of a recent argument telling it solely from their perspective. In their minds, they are seeking relationship counseling because of an argument or arguments. I ask a few more questions to get a greater understanding of their current challenges. Most of the time, they continue to refer back to the argument or arguments previously mentioned. I will follow that up with a question similar to this, "So if I am hearing you correctly, you are here because of an argument or arguments, not due to a lack of trust, connection, respect, communication, commitment, safety, and/or intimacy?". Arguments About $ Aren't About Money - Michael Swerdloff - Providence Holistic Counselor, Coach & Reiki ...

10 COVID-19 Emotions You’re Not the Only One Having

This is an incredibly helpful and informative article on coping with COVID-19 emotions. The suggestions for identifying what we are experiencing and knowing we are not the only ones going through this challenging period in human history is supportive and inclusive. This is the first time in human history that such a global pandemic has occurred since the internet, news media and social media has been as entrenched in our lives as it is now. We are experiencing an extremely high level of COVID-19 emotions that we're not present during other global pandemics. The reasons are two very critical situations - we did not know the specifics of what was happening throughout the world as we do now, and there is such a high degree of misinformation creating fear, confusion and distrust that did not exist previously. Anybody can post a blog on COVID-19 without any medical or pandemic knowledge or training, and find an audience of people that will believe them, make decisions based on the misinformation and spread false recommendations that others will share with others. This is harmful to our collective wellbeing on so many levels! Please be gentle with yourself. You are NOT supposed to be OK. We are all experiencing a wide range of COVID-19 emotions that are loud and at times overwhelming. Please be gentle with yourself, and ask for help if needed. 10 COVID-19 Emotions You're Not the Only One Having - Michael Swerdloff - Providence Holistic Counseling, Coaching and Reiki ...

Anger A Secondary Emotion – What Are We Protecting?

Many years ago, the psychologist who turned my life around once told me, "Michael, anger is a secondary emotion. You must feel another emotion first before you can experience anger. The primary emotion is typically fear, sometimes sadness or pain." Of course, I became even angrier when she said this! I remember thinking, "Fear, I am not scared of anything. I'm pissed off, not scared!" Her words haunted me. In the following weeks and months, every time I became angry, I often heard her in the back of my head whispering, "Michael, anger is a secondary emotion. You must feel another emotion first before you can experience anger." Notice how the fear part was left out of my process? Eventually, the part about fear also made its way into my process. That is when the shift began for me.

Anger - A Secondary Emotion - Providence Holistic Counseling Services...

Acknowledging Pain Is Highest Form of Support

Simply acknowledging someone else's pain or suffering is such a powerful means of support. It lets them know you are listening, you care and that they matter. When someone we know is suffering, we want to help. For many of us, our initial response is to offer them advice, guidance or "positive thoughts". Our intention is in the right place, although not nearly as effective as acknowledging their experience. If your goal is to provide help that facilitates a change, I invite you to consider acknowledging them before any other form of support.

...

Building Bridges or Building Walls

In relationships, typically, we are either building bridges or building walls. When we are building bridges, we are working towards connection, intimacy and safety. In contrast, when we are building walls, we are moving towards distance, isolation and discomfort and/or lack of safety. When we think about conflict resolution, it usually comes down to building bridges or building walls.   Building Bridges or Building Walls - Providence Holistic Counseling Services - Amaryllis Fox Everybody believes they are the good guy
...