11 results for tag: Sexual Trauma

Accepting New Reiki Counseling Clients!

Reiki counseling is a system my teacher designed for working with people through challenging and deep-seated issues. What makes it so effective is the combination of the loving and supportive energy of Reiki, helping somebody move to a slow enough brain rhythm that their inner resistance becomes less of an obstacle. Reiki also creates a safe enough container for us to work on issues that traditional therapy/counseling, bodywork, and many other modalities are not able to access in just a few sessions....

Honest Sex – An Updated Definition of Sex

Honest Sex. It is time for an updated, honest definition of sex. It is not 1958, and we are not the people we were then culturally. We want honest sex that meets the needs of all of us, not just a few. We look different, dress differently, connect differently, and act differently; we meet our dates and partners differently. Why would we not want to update our definition of sex? Let's explore this article on Honest Sex by Shana James from The Gottman Institute....

9 Things your Therapist wants you to Know

I thoroughly enjoyed reading this essay on things your therapist wants you to know! As a counselor, I often want to share many of the elements the author describes below. Many people make assumptions about therapists and counselors and what we know, don't know, or what we are like when we are not meeting with clients. I tend to chuckle when folks assume that I am someone that goes to bed early, gets up at dawn to meditate, and rarely if ever, goes out and comes home late at night, which I do often! Therapists and counselors are rarely shocked by your experiences or traumas. For someone like me that has been doing this since 1993, I have been present with folks sharing their experiences, challenges, and obstacles for a long time. I have also experienced plenty in my own life. I am ready for whatever your particular brand of mess or chaos that is your life. We all have messes in our lives!...

Addiction Is Not The Drugs, It’s The ACEs

Addiction Is Not The Drugs, It's The ACEs. As we learn more and more about addiction, its causes, and recovery, it is not what we thought it was, or at least it is not only what we thought it was. We now know that many addicts experienced trauma(s) and adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), adolescent trauma, or multiple traumas resulting in PTSD or complex PTSD (cPTSD). Thanks to the research and work by Johann Hari, we discovered another clue to the cause of addiction, a lack of connection. We will continue to learn and develop better and more holistic treatment and recovery for addicts and alcoholics. This particular article focuses predominantly on addiction to drugs and alcohol, but it mostly definitely applies to the full spectrum of addictions. Many of us have experienced ACEs and much has been documented about the repercussions throughout life. But what about the relationship between ACEs and addiction?Is was what we call addiction just a way of creating comfort, and the illusion of safety through repeated actions to relieve the symptoms of ACEs?What if you felt safe and comfortable in your mind, body and spirit?Do you think you would still need to chase the feeling of numbness/comfort through obsessive behaviors?What if we learned that we have been "treating a stomach ache with an aspirin" all these years?What if we knew definitively that addiction is not the drugs, but something deep inside us, what would shift in you?...

Empath or Trauma Response?

Are you an empath or trauma responses being expressed from childhood? In recent years there are a number of people that have identified themselves as empaths that express an attitude of superiority to those who are not empaths. They think they are "special". I find this troubling on multiple levels. An empath is not something that you train or study to become, it is typically a response to childhood trauma and heightened sense of vigilance. Is experiencing a challenging childhood a reason to feel superior to others?
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Stop Trying To Fix Me – I Am Not Broken

I am not broken. As often is the case when we try to "fix" somebody, we inadvertently tell them we think they are broken. Why would something need to be "fixed" if it is not broken? This poem by Jeff Foster is a beautiful Illustration of a person who  has the strength and courage to say, "I am not broken!". I am not lost cat with a broken leg, a muffler or a hot water heater. I am a human being that deserves respect, care, affection and attention. I am not broken. It is not your job to fix me, nor is it wanted or helpful. Love me instead....

This Sculpture Shows The Inner Child In Us – Love

We all have a little boy or little girl inside us, or both. Many people refer to this part of ourselves as the Inner Child. The term Inner Child gets used a lot these days, but what is the Inner Child? I like the description below. "The inner child lives in all of us; it is who we were before life happened to us. When the negative experiences of life happen in childhood, our inner child becomes fragmented. We disconnect from that vital aspect of ourselves and shove that part of our psyche down into the dark. As we grow up, the inner child is still very much alive, often dictating our responses to life. Those traumas that you experi...