5 results for tag: Addictions & Recovery
Being Sober – Alcoholism Is About Pain; Not Drinking Too Much
Getting and staying sober is a monumental task. It takes an incredible amount effort and commitment, especially in the beginning. Getting sober isn't the goal though. The goal is to become at minimum a decent human being, if not an exceptional one. Somehow our culture has created this illusional that staying sober is the destination, it's not even close. Getting sober is the springboard to something better. Staying sober is not the goal like getting married isn't the goal in a relationship. The goal for both alcoholics and marriages is to be healthy, balanced and live your best life with solid, sustainable relationships that support love, connection and respect.
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... Meditation Training in Rhode Island!
I am very excited to offer a Meditation Training in Rhode Island! This three-part series will be excellent for beginners and those who already have a meditation practice. We will cover the basics of meditation, and various styles and methods. We will have real life experiences with each style plus time to practice. This meditation training series is constructed so that you will have two weeks between each session to practice.
Meditation practice isn’t about trying to throw ourselves away and become something better, it’s about befriending who we are. – Ani Pema Chodron ...
Personal and Spiritual Development Group!
Personal & Spiritual Development Group Elements
1) Each group session will begin with a quick check-in to help us be present.
2) We will move into a guided meditation.
3) A topic will be introduced.
4) A discussion of the topic will emerge.
5) The group will engage in processing the topic, along with anything that comes up organically in discussion.This will be the largest allotment of our time together.
6) We will complete our session with a closing meditation together.
What forms of meditation will we experience?
We will practice and experiment with several forms of sitting meditation including breath watching, mantra, chanting, ...
Anger A Secondary Emotion – What Are We Protecting?
Many years ago, the psychologist who turned my life around once told me, "Michael, anger is a secondary emotion. You must feel another emotion first before you can experience anger. The primary emotion is typically fear, sometimes sadness or pain." Of course, I became even angrier when she said this! I remember thinking, "Fear, I am not scared of anything. I'm pissed off, not scared!" Her words haunted me. In the following weeks and months, every time I became angry, I often heard her in the back of my head whispering, "Michael, anger is a secondary emotion. You must feel another emotion first before you can experience anger." Notice how the fear part was left out of my process? Eventually, the part about fear also made its way into my process. That is when the shift began for me.
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Change Is Possible – Change Really Is Possible
I am often asked a question that baffles me, "Can people REALLY change?". I am baffled because it astounds me that people do not recognize how we are all changing in large and small ways all the time. However, I do relate to the experience of feeling hopeless that I cannot change enough to enjoy life. This I understand. I can still recall clearly that night in October of 1989 when for a moment I felt life was not worth living. An image flashed across my mind of driving my car into my then girlfriend, who was standing right in front of me, followed by me crashing into the large oak tree across the street. It was clear in my mind. We were arguing in the street outside of her house in front of my car. In that moment, it made complete sense to me. I felt like there was no other viable option.
At the time, I was six months clean and sober in so-called recovery, things did not feel better. In fact, they felt worse. I did not believe I could change. I did not believe life could or would improve. I did not believe I was capable of rigorous honesty as the A.A. Preamble stated; "Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves. There are such unfortunates. They are not at fault; they seem to have been born that way. They are naturally incapable of grasping and developing a manner of living which demands rigorous honesty." I believed that I was not capable of being honest with myself, therefore, I could not recover. I was wrong.
A man who was forty years sober then told me if I wanted to change, I needed to tie my shoes differently. That was the beginning. All the successes I have enjoyed since that night began with one small choice. This is not some cute fable or a new age platitude. This is my real-life experience of change and growth.
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