6 results for tag: Boundaries

My Fantasy of the Dalai Lama was Shattered & I am Sad Today

I was scrolling through my Facebook feed yesterday and noticed that a friend I respect and admire had made a casual, sarcastic, and off-putting comment about the Dalai Lama. My initial reaction was, “What the f*ck?” Anger, betrayal, and rejection of my friend, not the Dalai Lama, rose inside me. She is not somebody who typically speaks harshly of people. So, I did what we do in 2023. I did a Google search on the Dalai Lama. The first eight were articles about him and his life. When I read the ninth, my heart sank and my spine went limp for a split second. “The Dalai Lama asks a boy to suck his tongue.” I resisted opening the ...

Are you really being accountable?

In the last handful of years, there has been an increased focus on being accountable and taking responsibility for our actions. I have really appreciated seeing the energy and attention towards wanting to do and be better, primarily birthed by GenZ and Millennials. It’s about time! But are we truly being accountable, or are we just telling people what we’ve done wrong and why we did it?   I invite you to read the full article on being accountable including the steps to cleaning up mistakes here: Are you really being accountable?   Being responsible and accountable is about changing our behaviors, and the patterns that ...

Boundaries Help Us Connect + Exquisite Consent

I have just returned from two weeks at the annual Dance New England Dance Camp. I have been a participant for eleven years and an organizer for the last four. We created an ad hoc Consent and Boundaries Team to support even more safety and connection within our community. We created an amazing flyer on exquisite boundaries (below), we offered an evening dinner table for conversations around consent, a powerful and entertaining forum on consent and boundaries including Playback Theater, and we purchased 300 wristbands with the saying, "Boundaries Help Us Connect". It was an intense and rewarding experience creating these programs that were received enthusiastically!...

18 Invaluable Pieces of Advice From Therapists & Counselors

There are not many common pieces of advice from therapists and counselors, since we have diverse training, backgrounds and experiences, but this list seems accurate. The themes around boundaries/saying "no", protecting yourself, letting go of relationships that are not supporting your growth and peace, are essential and agreed upon generally across the field. Of course, your specific situation and circumstances are important to consider as well. My favorite piece of advice from therapists and counselors is first on their list, "Feelings are not facts."  I wish we would all be able to integrate this nugget of wisdom in our lives!
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Green Flags For Your Relationship

We are all familiar with the "red flags" to be aware of when starting a new relationship. The green flags, however, do not get as much attention. We have possibly spent too much time making sure everyone knows what to avoid in relationships, and perhaps not enough focus on what to embrace in relationships. The list of green flags are an attempt to offer another lens to view and assess what is productive and necessary to thrive and prosper in relationships. Of the 6 Little Green Flags That You've Found A Keeper shared below, I would like to focus on just a few of them. Beginning with being able to be your authentic self around them is key. If you feel safe enough around them to not feel like you have to look, sound and/or be different in their presence than you do with your inner circle is essential. Or, from the reverse perspective, why would you want to be with someone that you do not feel like being yourself is enough or acceptable? ...

The Feminist Guide To Non-Creepy Flirting

I was reading The Feminist Guide to Non-Creepy Flirting and thought it may be helpful to share with readers. I know many men see the word "feminist" and immediately stop reading or become defensive. For the men that this applies to, I invite you to hang in there and reap the benefits of the wisdom and knowledge helping you connect with women that you want to meet. I do not believe anything that is written below is either offensive or disrespectful. In fact, I wish when I was young, the information that is shared here was available to me. I am certain many women along the way would have been grateful as well! I hope you enjoy the Feminist Guide to Non-Creepy Flirting as much as I did....