36 results for tag: Addiction Counseling
Trauma Is Not Your Fault, But Healing Is Your Responsibility
We all come into this life with stuff to unpack and learn. Some of us have entered life with more significant challenges than others. It can be said that ALL OF US have endured trauma in one form or another. This can mean being neglected as children, being abused as a child, teen or adult, military, sexual assault and rape, alcoholism and drug addiction, poverty, and racial and cultural issues, just to name a few forms of trauma. We all experience these challenges in different ways. It has become widespread for self-help and pop psychology "gurus" to present pathology as a singular, logical pattern that explains life experiences through a lens that, in all cases, "this means that" and all people experience "this and that" the same. It is false and damaging to the millions of people who read or hear these claims and wonder why it is not valid for them. We have our shared experiences but in our own unique way. That is one of the joys of being human!
No two people experience trauma the same, but there are enough common traits to share and learn from each other and gain support and camaraderie. I can learn from you and vice-versa. I remember when my cousin returned from Vietnam, he would not discuss what happened to anyone. Then, one day, a friend of his who was also a Vietnam vet was over. He talked and talked about what he saw and did for hours. We were all surprised after not hearing him speak about it for more than a paragraph after being home for several years. The same applies to people participating in Twelve-Step or cancer survivor groups. Shared experiences help us feel like we belong and we are not alone. This is important in moving forward through traumatic experiences.
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Self-Sabotage – I Am Willing To Do Anything… But That
It is very common for clients whom I work with, when asked what are you willing to do to grow or improve your situation, to offer a very specific and inspiring response. "I am willing to do anything and everything to make things better!" A part of me gets really excited about their enthusiastic reply. My excitement and optimism still exist after 25 years of this kind of work, knowing that we are about to embark on the first stage of self-sabotage. Self-sabotage can, at times, be really obvious and others, very deceptive and tricky.
I take a deep breath and ask them are you willing to do____? Their enthusiasm and conviction that were on full display just a moment earlier disappear. Some combination of resentment, bitterness, fear, and/or anger replaces the enthusiasm. Self-sabotage has now planted its roots and is ready to dig in to do anything and everything except for "that".
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... They See a Dark Shadow, You See the Bright Light that Casts It
Are you a bright light? Are you shining at your highest intensity? What do you need to become the bright light you were meant to be?
They see a dark shadow, you see the bright light that casts it. They see the night, you see the moon. They see a mistake, you see a lesson.
Published on LinkedIn on January 30, 2018
Oleg Vishnepolsky
A group of students was asked to list what they thought were the present “Seven Wonders of the World.” Though there were some disagreements, the following received the most votes:
1. Egypt’s Great Pyramids
2. Taj Mahal
3. Grand Canyon
4. Panama Canal
5. Empire ...
Women & Booze: Is Everything We Know About Alcoholism Wrong? – mindbodygreen.com
This is an interesting article on Women & Booze. The main thesis is that men and women interact with alcohol differently, therefore, Alcoholic Anonymous is not the best option for women, since many are not alcoholic according to the author. There are several important points she raises about women & booze such as the lack of ability of A.A, to adapt and update program elements that may not make sense any longer, or maybe never did. This is valid and I have presented similar thoughts before. In addition, the chapter, "To Wives" was not actually written by Lois Wilson, which further supports the claims of AA being anti-feminist Who ...
Spiritual Bypassing, Relationships and The Shadow
I first started becoming aware of spiritual bypassing a few years ago. My eyes opened wide as I was reading the page in front of me. "A spiritual bypass or spiritual bypassing is a "tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks" John Welwood & Tina Fossella. This was it! This was the thing I had been aware of for years in myself and others that I had not known what it was or how to describe it! I was so excited that there really was such a "thing" and it had a name. I have cut out parts of the article below, but most of the content on spiritual bypassing is included....
Do Feelings Matter? Refections on Feelings in Our Lives
I was recently reading an article in Psychology Today, Life Lessons: 16 Truths to Embrace Now. Providence Holistic Counseling Services is listed in Psychology Today, so I receive a print copy monthly. I rarely read the articles because they feel like typical pop culture, sensationalistic headlines with not a lot of solid content. I also find that the cover is typically an image of a young, white, attractive, thin female Photoshopped to look seductive with thick lipstick covering parted lips. An embarrassment to the industry. Every now and then, I am wrong and they dig a little deeper. The ideas of the various writers who contributed to this article are helpful and well written. One of them referenced how the current generation of young adults place a great preference on what they feel and their emotions. This got me thinking. The question that came to mind is, "Do feelings matter?"
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... Open Up – School of Life
Open Up, a short video demonstrating the power of honesty and sharing our secrets. Communication is essential to creating and maintaining positive relationships. The risk seems too great but is it really? I encourage you to explore which is a greater risk, isolation and silence or sharing and connection?
