Stop Trying To Fix Me – I Am Not Broken
I am not broken. As often is the case when we try to "fix" somebody, we inadvertently tell them we think they are broken. Why would something need to be "fixed" if it is not broken? This poem by Jeff Foster is a beautiful Illustration of a person who has the strength and courage to say, "I am not broken!". I am not lost cat with a broken leg, a muffler or a hot water heater. I am a human being that deserves respect, care, affection and attention. I am not broken. It is not your job to fix me, nor is it wanted or helpful. Love me instead....
This Sculpture Shows The Inner Child In Us – Love
Trauma Is Not Your Fault, But Healing Is Your Responsibility
Anger A Secondary Emotion – What Are We Protecting?
Many years ago, the psychologist who turned my life around once told me, "Michael, anger is a secondary emotion. You must feel another emotion first before you can experience anger. The primary emotion is typically fear, sometimes sadness or pain." Of course, I became even angrier when she said this! I remember thinking, "Fear, I am not scared of anything. I'm pissed off, not scared!" Her words haunted me. In the following weeks and months, every time I became angry, I often heard her in the back of my head whispering, "Michael, anger is a secondary emotion. You must feel another emotion first before you can experience anger." Notice how the fear part was left out of my process? Eventually, the part about fear also made its way into my process. That is when the shift began for me.
Rules For Fair Fighting In Relationships
Building Bridges or Building Walls
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Spiritual Teachings on Smiling – The Janitor: Part II
“Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.” Dr. Seuss
I began working with the Urban League of Greater Madison in October of 2003 as a Social Worker serving adolescents' mental, emotional, social, cultural, and academic needs of the student population in Madison, Wisconsin. I loved the work and the kids.Spiritual Teachings on Smiling and Humility
After being at the school for a little while, I began to build a relationship with one of the janitors. His name is Oscar, and he is a beautiful man born and raised in Costa Rica. He has a dark complexion seen on the Caribbean Coast of Costa Rican with a graying beard, sideburns, and short, wavy, balding hair. He typically wears T-shirts with bright colors. Oscar’s brown eyes are full and deep. He moved to the States several years ago as an adult. He is friendly in such a warm and genuine way that it is hard not to want to be around him. His smile beams greater than almost anyone I’ve ever seen, radiating the hallway during casual conversation. Oscar always finds a minute to engage in brief interactions, each filled with his presence and sweetness. ...Spiritual Training in Humility: The Janitor Part I
“Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right.” Ezra Taft Benson
Spiritual Training on Humility: The Janitor Part I
It was the Winter of 1993-1994. I had only once visited the Tibetan Buddhist Learning Center, Labsum Shedrup Ling, in Washington, New Jersey. A good friend and I decided we’d spend New Year's together on a retreat at the center. The retreat focused on The Buddhist Lineage, which I had no idea what that meant upon arrival. Before I dive in, I would like to mention that I knew very little about Buddhism or Tibetan Buddhism in general when we signed up to take part; my friend did. I just knew that I had an Inner Connection with Buddhism. The first time I noticed him was during the first shared meal. He sat somewhat distant from most guests, but I could tell he lived there. He wore plain grey pants and a shirt that most janitors wear. He seemed almost disinterested in the events and happenings around him. The man appeared to be enjoying his meal as if content and grateful just to be there. The first thought I had while watching him was, "WOW! If this is what their janitors are like, I can't wait to see the monks! I am definitely going to become a Buddhist." He helped clean up as if he does it every day, and part of what he does there. He showed people where to find things as a typical worker would do at any place else. But there was something very different about this janitor. He was so simple and radiant in his way of being, smiling simply but beautifully with a rare sincerity. I noticed myself staring and observing him beyond what is socially acceptable, but I couldn't stop myself. He was special in a way that I had not known before. I was in awe of how this man carried himself and the Inner contentment that was his being. I remember thinking, "Where do they find janitors like this in Tibet?" Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, he was an older Tibetan man, possibly in his sixties, with those facial features that only men and women that have walked this earth for a while and have learned more than the rest of us express. The lines on their faces seem deeper and richer, as if each one is telling a story. ...What Porcupines Can Teach Us About Making Love
Accepting New Reiki Counseling Clients!
9 Signs You’ve Done Your Shadow Work
Conflict Resolution: Transform Your Conflict Cycle
Conflict resolution skills allow us to shift our conflict cycle to create an environment supportive of connection, safety, trust, and intimacy. Trust is the primary component of successful relationships and connections. Creating or rebuilding trust can take time, patience, and a willingness to step outside our comfort zone through conflict resolution...."What is conflict? Conflict is a normal part of any healthy relationship. After all, two people can’t be expected to agree on everything, all the time. The key is not to fear or try to avoid conflict but to learn how to resolve it in a healthy way.
When conflict is mismanaged, it can cause great harm to a relationship, but when handled in a respectful, positive way, conflict provides an opportunity to strengthen the bond between two people. Whether you’re experiencing conflict at home, work, or school, learning these skills can help you resolve differences in a healthy way and build stronger, more rewarding relationships." Excerpt from Conflict Resolution Skills.
First Degree Reiki Training April 20 & 21 2024
What Are We Fighting For?
A New Study Reveals the Secret of Why Men Fall in Love
Why men fall in love. This is not as obvious as it seems on the surface.
When I was an adolescent boy, I was very confused about what it was that I liked about girls besides their physical appearance. There were girls who I thought were very pretty and attractive, but I had no desire to be with them. Conversely, there were girls that I was only mildly physically attracted to, but they were fun, intelligent, attractive, creative, and forces of nature, which turned me on in a completely different way. When attracted to them, physically, mentally, and emotionally, my brain didn't work well! I was flooded with emotions, feelings, and thoughts that I didn't know what to do with, and felt shame about most of them. Looking back, I am aware that physical attraction was often the starting point. It didn't make sense to me, because I did not have a "type" of girl that I was attracted to. I was confused by how I felt powerless about who I got excited about, and who I didn't.
First Degree Reiki Training on April 20 & 21!
I am offering a First Degree Reiki Training on April 20 & 21! I invite you to view more info here.
Online Lunchtime Meditation Practice Tuesdays and Thursdays!
I am incredibly excited about offering online lunch meditation practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 12:15-12:45 (Eastern Time)! This is a drop-in practice; you do not need to register or sign up if you want to participate. No previous meditation experience is necessary! For more info and a Zoom Link, click here.
Online Counseling & Coaching!
I now provide Online Counseling & Coaching. For more info.