Gender
My Fantasy of the Dalai Lama was Shattered & I am Sad Today
I was scrolling through my Facebook feed yesterday and noticed that a friend I respect and admire had made a casual, sarcastic, and off-putting comment about the Dalai Lama.
My initial reaction was, “What the f*ck?”
Anger, betrayal, and rejection of my friend, not the Dalai Lama, rose inside me. She is not somebody who typically speaks harshly of people.
So, I did what we do in 2023. I did a Google search on the Dalai Lama. The first eight were articles about him and his life. When I read the ninth, my heart sank and my spine went limp for a split second.
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The World Needs More Healers—Not More Flakes.
This morning, elephant journal published one of my articles, The World Needs More Healers—Not More Flakes, and it is an Editors Pick of The Week!
Here is an excerpt from The World Needs More Healers—Not More Flakes.:
I don’t know how this came to be, but somehow the new age community thinks that one has to be a flake in order to be a healer.
"I can tell you with complete certainty one can be a healer, shaman, teacher, or Reiki Master without being a flake.
The shift toward flakiness is curious. I am grateful that the dogmatic version of spiritu...
Dating Through Gottman Principles
Imagine everybody dating through Gottman Principles. What would it feel like to be and connect with people safely as authentic selves? Dating through Gottman Principles offers opportunities for connection, comfort, and a chance to get to know each other slowly and safely.
I support the author's perspective of dating through Gottman principles, including meeting in real life soon after matching. Real life offers the nearness to explore chemistry, to feel the connection and energy, and your physical presence.
Whether you are single, couples, or practicing ethical non-monogamy, Gottman Card Decks are a fun way to discover all kinds of interesting and juicy aspects of your date! They also make an app for your phone or tablet as well. Dating through Gottman Principles supports connection, intimacy, and safety in all stages of relationships.
The work I do with couples is loosely based on Gottman Principles. To find out more about The Gottman Method....
Sex Therapy – Is It Time to See a Sex Therapist?
How do you know when it is time to see a Sex Therapist or Sex Counselor? First things first, how do you know IF you would benefit from seeing a Sex Therapy or Sex Counseling?
What is Sex Therapy and Sex Counseling?
Sex Therapy 101
"First, let’s talk about what this particular type of therapy is. Put very simply, the goal is to help you have a sex life that feels healthy and happy to you. Sex therapy recognizes that sexuality is an integral part of our lives, and seeks to provide education and resources to support you. It can include things like identifying your beliefs or blockages around sex, helping you gain clarity on your goals for your sex life, providing accurate and shame-free information, teaching new sexual skills, improving your communication, or developing sexual self-confidence. Even though there still aren’t a ton of sex therapists out there, I think it’s really important to look around before picking who you want to work with. I strongly believe that the fit between the sex therapist and client is important. If you don’t feel connected to and trusting of who you work with, you’re not going to get much benefit out of the experience. Check out the websites of a few therapists in detail before booking an appointment, and don’t be afraid to end your working relationship if your gut’s telling you it doesn’t feel right." This excerpt is from What Happens In Sex Therapy? by VANESSA MARIN...
Porn Addiction, Loneliness and Connection
Porn addiction is increasing at a rapid pace. We know that access to online porn continues to create loneliness, disconnection and porn addiction. But is porn the actual problem? Again, we come back to the findings of Johann Hari. His research and personal experiences, as well as my own, support the theory that addictions are often a lack meaningful connection(s). This applies to porn addiction as well. The work we do in recovery from porn addiction includes focusing on creating new connections, and strengthening those already existing. These connections, and forming new habits can begin the process of feeling safe and a sense of belonging, all foundations of a sustainable recovery....
Addiction Is Not The Drugs, It’s The ACEs
Being Better Humans Support Group (Online)!
Come join the circle!
What are we doing?
We are a support group of people discussing their honest feelings on relationships, drugs, love, sex, money, and work. We’ll pick a topic, trade stories, have a moderated discussion, and maybe scream, cry, or yell (if needed). We’ll dive in deep and not let fear keep us from expressing who we really are. We’ll explore what makes us amazing and far from amazing, where we need to grow and what gets in the way of growing, how to trust ourselves and others and what obstacles get in the way of trust. We’ll find what environments support our safety, and how to set boundaries in those that don’t. Most importantly, we’ll just practice being our authentic selves. We may include meditation, movement and other practices designed to create clarity, presence and truth. What we do will be guided by what shows up at every session. We will have assignments between sessions to reflect more deeply and practice whatever we worked on together.
